IKEA’s Chocolate Cake Tastes Like Crap – Butch Explains Why

Call me sheltered, but I had never even heard of IKEA until they arrived in Denver maybe two years ago. Now it seems as though the place is like the most popular thing on planet earth. Still, I stay away because I have no need for a second couch or a new bed. Furniture beside the point, I must be really naive, because I had no idea until last week that IKEA also has food! Said food is getting quite a bad name. 

The furniture mega store is also pretty well known for its Swedish meatballs, which recently received a lot of attention after inspectors discovered that some of them were made with bits of horse meat. But don't worry - if you're one of the many unfortunate meatball eaters who happened to munch on a bit of mare, you'll be happy to know that horse meat is the least of your problems.

You may expect to find wood chips or paint in a furniture stores food, but what food inspectors in China discovered in the chocolate cakes was a bit more disturbing.

In the Tarta Mork Choklad, the inspectors found a strain of bacteria commonly found in human and animal feces.

That brings me to wonder first, why there is poop in the chocolate cake? And second, how did it get there?

Here is the best I scenario I can come up with...

Bob the bed builder at IKEA ate one of the stores famous meatballs, and since his stomach was not used to the horse meat it was made with, his stomach got a little squirmy. Bob couldn't hold it much longer, and Colin the couch builder had been in the bathroom forever. Thats when Bob went looking for another bathroom, but on his way went through the kitchen. There he saw a huge pot of a brown substance. Thinking that no one would notice if he relieved himself in the pot, Bob proceeded to get rid of his meatballs. When the chef came back, he gave the cake one last stir and baked the crap filled cakes. And there you have my version of the sh**tiest cake you've ever heard of!

[UPROXX.COM]