Butch Shows You How to Ensure No One Ever Steals Your Food From the Work Fridge

Like most places of employment, here at the 94.3 Loudwire studio, we don't get our own personal refrigerators, and that means we all have to share one. That also means that if you put your food in there you are trusting your coworkers not to eat it. My office has a problem keeping their hands off my raspberries. So, awhile back I took it upon myself to assure that wouldn't happen again... 

I got the idea from a picture I recently saw on Reddit, but added my own little spin.

And in case you can't read my horrible writing it says this:

Attention!!!

If you took a container of raspberries out of this fridge sometime this week... You need to CONTACT POISON CONTROL IMMEDIATELY!!! They were for a science project and were soaking in dog ejaculate to see if it becomes flammable after 3 days (like the rumor states). Just concerned it may make you sick!

Now, I am hoping three things come out of this... One, I hope no one steals my fruit again. secondly, I hope the boss-man isn't easily offended by the words "dog ejaculate," and finally, I hope no one actually goes to poison control because there isn't really any dog seaman on the fruit, and even if there was, I don't think it would hurt you... However, if they do, we will have our culprit!