Man Erects Inappropriate Statue

First of all stop laughing at the word, erect. Grow up.

I'm going to start a new weekly feature called inappropriate statues. In my first installment, I give you this beauty:

WJBK/Lenka Tuohy

A Michigan man bought a house next door to his ex-wife (and kids) because he's a dumbass. Why would you move next door to your ex-wife? To be close to your kids, I guess? Either way, man, that's dumbassery.

To take it to another level , he had that statue built. I posted the blurred out version because you're incredibly fragile AND there's no way of knowing what's behind the blur. The blur is the m***********g asterisk of photography.

Alan Markovitz, who moved into the home in Bloomfield Hills, said he never meant for the matter to be public. Right. That's how I keep things on the down low too - I commission the creation of 12 foot tall, inappropriate statues. All of this means there is sculptor in Michigan who was not phased when asked to create such a thing as I guess he/she does that sort of thing on the regular. It is Michigan. People are mad there, I'm told.

If you want to keep things secret, don't have giant statues erected. You laughed at the word again. Mature.

I'll be doing a story about beavers and Uranus coming up that will likely cause you to explode. Grow up.